Divine Hot Seat

life is not so much about the answers we get but the questions that we live in

UPDATE: Saturday is the new publication day for Seed of Devotion. I find that, as a reader, I have more space for reflection on the weekend, and Seed of Devotion fits into that reflective kind of genre.

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An Archive Highlight from August 14th, 2011 (24 years old)

The morning of the Los Angeles Rathayatra parade and festival, Mother Kosha Rupa approached me to ask, "Bhakti, would you like to do an hour in the Question and Answer booth?"

I paused for a moment. Los Angeles Rathayatra is one of the largest Hare Krishna festivals in North America with outreach to thousands of people. The Question & Answer booth at this particular festival is an intense experience - crowds of people from Venice Beach flow in and out of the tent in waves and ask questions that spark fires. In previous years, I've usually just passed by, even a little intimidated by the intensity.

But this summer I’ve been on an adventure of surrender. A smile blossomed on my face and I replied, "Yes, Mother Kosha Rupa, I would love to!"

So after the exhilarating parade down Venice Beach in the hot sun, I wove my way through the crowds to the Question & Answer tent. The host introduced me and then waved me up to the front.

With a deep breath, I slowly sat down in the hot seat... and looked up to the crowd of people who faced me, their heads cocked with curiosity.

"So," I spoke into the microphone. "Does anyone have a question?"

A man towards the back raised his hand, sternness written all over his face. He called out, "Why is God so great?"

I took a deep, deep breath. I felt the heat rise to my face. People kept gathering, stopping and crowding around the tent amidst the bustling Venice Beach sidewalks, curious to see what this young girl would say to such a question. In the silence, I called out to my spiritual teachers for inspiration.

And then I spoke.

As I unraveled words that I didn’t even know I had inside of me, the man’s stern face slowly, slowly softened. At last I asked him, “Does that answer your question?”

His expression told me more than his words as he nodded, “Yes, yes it does.”

That was just the warm-up.

“Why is it implied in the Bhagavad Gita that women are less intelligent?”

“Is the Hare Krishna chant the only way to develop love of God?”

“Why have you fallen in love with Krishna?”

One hour passed like a rollercoaster ride. When I stepped aside for the next speaker, I felt a little woozy and unsteady on my feet. I had just dived into mysteries of the soul, existence, love, God, creation, and even the controversies of my faith. And at the times when I wanted to melt into a puddle on the floor, I called out to Srila Prabhupad and my spiritual teacher, Radhanath Swami, to please guide me.

And the words that came out of my mouth were simply not my own.

I have attended countless Rathayatras over the years. But when I walked away from that Question & Answer tent to join the bustling festival once again, I felt like I had just tumbled into a new world with fresh eyes.

As a friend of mine shared with me a couple days ago, "Life is not so much about the answers we get but the questions we live in."

These are the questions I want to live in forever, especially that very first one.

“Why IS God so great?”